9.29.2010

The Innevitable Binge

Do You Binge?
Do you binge from time to time? Everyone has their crutch, what's yours? Just admit it...you've got one. Running Off the Reese's and I have decided there are officially 3 types of binge eating... which I'm sure apply to all types of binging, whether it be eating, drinking, etc.

Type 1: Binging With a Friend.
Binging is fun when you get together and it becomes a "social" thing. It's always more fun to binge with a friend than without one. When you're binging with a friend, it's suddenly ok. Someone else is doing it too, so it must be normal.

Type 2: Binging...Alone
We've all done it. The day goes wrong or too long, a break-up happens or you're just feeling unusually emotional one day and BAM...before you know it, you've gone through an entire pack of Elf cookies or a whole pint of Cookies'n'Cream icecream before you can blink an eye and realize what you're doing. When you finish that pack of cookies or pint of ice cream, suddenly you realize...you're all alone. No one is binging with you. Then the guilt sinks in. You have just binged solo.

Type 3: Binging Alone with a Friend in the Room
No matter what the reason for the binge, it's awful when you do it in front of another human being, or even your pet, and they refuse to join you in the binge. How embarrassing, you've been caught! The utmost dehumanizing binge of the 3. If you catch yourself Type 3 binging often ya better watch out....you may be a serious binger and Type 2 diabetes is just around the corner.

On a Happier Note
The cool front that came to Corpus Monday morning...is gone...and with that, the mosquitoes have returned with a vengeance!

9.28.2010

Doggie Day Care

Doggie Day Care
Who knew I would be that person who took my pooch to doggie day care? I would like to say I love my dog and we have grown close after 4 years of growing up and going to college together, but WOW she's gotten restless since her cousin Lou...



(aka: The Flash/The Blur) moved to San Marcos. With no little "my size friend" to play with, Maddie gets...dare I say it...sad. So, when I have long 7 hour days at school, I drop her off at Bruno's Bath House



...and her favorite part about the whole thing is she gets to boss all of her new friends around while I'm getting an education....again.

I TOTALLY understand the reasoning behind Mother's Day Out...I will enroll in that program the minute a child is conceived in my house...wherever that house may be...one day...not any time soon.

So to all of my relatives who are concerned about Maddie's well-being in the hot, sweltering, holy land we call Corpus Christi, she is doing fine and has made tons of puppy pals!


9.27.2010

Trainer Scott...I'm so sorry we picked you

Let's Weight Train!
"Running Off the Reese's" and I decided to work with a trainer on campus and do weight training.



His name is Scott and he is precious. That poor poor soul for ever becoming a trainer, and then ending up with the Reese's cup-lover and myself. He's going to be SO uncomfortable for the next 9 weeks each and every time I come into the rec and make a ton of inappropriate jokes.

Basically, he has no idea what he's getting himself into.

Week 1: Body Assessment
Let's just say it was a shock to have my bod assessed for the first time in 6 years. The last time I was assessed (aka: weight, BMI, BP, measurements, fat/muscle mass, the whole bit) was when I was a 16 year old track runnin-fool with a BMI of 14. Ohhh, the good old days of being whipped around the track by satan's spawn (also known as "coach").



So the body assessment comes to a close and I'm pretty sure I have made Scott so uncomfortable that he may regret taking me and Reese's on.

Yes, Scott, I'm going to make TOTALLY inappropriate jokes about my body...it's just what I do. Especially while you're measuring my thigh blubber. I just praise da Lord he measured the fat at the midway mark between the hip and knee...instead of further up the leg...we would have gotten into some BIG numbers if he would have gone north with that tape measure!

Yes, Scott, I'm going to try to make Reese's laugh when we're doing 3 minutes of "step"...especially after she almost fell off her step. Lol...

So when we told Scott that we're running a 1/2 marathon he seemed shocked and thought it may be a joke...the 100th joke made within an hour of arriving. Scott, are you saying we're out of shape? Hahaha.

Can't WAIT for week 2...I will have to come up with a new comedy routine and see what sort of shocked faces I can get out of Scott on Monday.

My Poor Garmin

My Poor Garmin gets no use
My Garmin watch does everything in the world for me including: measuring distance in miles, keeping time, tracking my calorie burn, and lots more! If you're ever considering training for a race, this watch is the way to go!



Sadly, my sweet Garmin received no attention for the entire month of September. I know...how the heck do you train for a 1/2 marathon when you don't use your odometer at all? Well you don't. I'm back down to jogging a total of 3 miles per day. I should definitely be up to at least 7 miles by now. But I can't get discouraged, I will keep jogging my little body down the street until I get to 12 solid miles!

Bring it blacktop!

9.26.2010

Yoga...What I wish it could be

Yoga Class
As "Running Off the Reese's" and I go through the tedious process of living healthy, we came across a yoga class on campus and decided to attend the Sunday-evening class. I've never been to a yoga class that was 90 MINUTES LONG! Oh my goodness, that's a long time to "pose."



I felt like a moo-del...there are so many different things you can do with your limbs!

Phones and Yoga
Turn off your phone while in ANY workout class...but especially yoga. When you're standing on one leg, with the other tucked up into you thigh fat...trying to balance....



and a PHONE RINGS....





You WILL fall over.


Thank you, whoever you were, for not turning off your phone during yoga! I owe you a good bruise to the face!

Corpse's Pose
"Does anyone not know what corpse's pose is?"...I don't. What the hell is a corpse pose? Sounds creepy to me. Apparently this is the relaxation pose of the yogi. So, you lay down on your back...



Corpse's Pose!


....that's it.



....really....that's it.

Obviously, my inner-dialogue is going off like crazy during corpse's pose. So after 5 minutes of solid corpse's pose my back is "stuck". Basically I have a glitch in my back where I can't move unless I roll onto my side. It's not as much fun as it sounds. Back to the inner-dialogue... I honestly thought our yoga instructor had collapsed into heart failure and couldn't bring us out of corpse's pose...hence us being there for a solid 45 minutes....on our backs.

A point that my yoga-buddy/beach-buddy and I agreed on, was that we could have taken a nap during our relaxation pose...and as a result could have been really embarrassed if a snore would have jerked us out of a solid sleep while everyone else was meditating.

Post 90-Minute body Hell
After 90 minutes of pure hell on my body, it was finally over. On my way home, a gas station visit was necessary and I purchased a bottle of vino. Someone might as well stick a nipple on it and call it "adult" formula...wait I think someone has already done that...

Today's end-thought: I wish I could fall asleep and someone would work/stretch my body and then I would wake up rejuvenated.

9.25.2010

Me and Usha have Confessions

Confessions...Part 1
Like Usher, I too, have a confession...but I will spare you my awful song-writing skills and just tell you what my closet-skeleton of the week is.


I have an entire bookshelf full of books I haven't read, have started reading and not finished or have been given and I haven't even touched for weeks, months and years. I was recently told I just HAD to read the book, of course I don't remember what it was called...so I can't tell you. But I responded to the comment that I had about 6 books I had to finish reading before I bought a new one.

I have been bad.

After meeting with my boss at good old Barnes & Noble, I stumbled upon 2 books I just couldn't live without. So I added them to my collection of must-reads yesterday!



And...



I'm so excited to read them!!

More Social Cues...or the lack thereof
Today was a fabulous day-off at the beach with "Running Off the Reese's," mimosas and a good book...I'm officially finishing 1 book at a time from my collection of "untouched" libros. Wish me luck!

So we pull up onto the beach, next to some awkward college newbies. 3 girls, 3 boys, 1 big ocean to separate them...even though they all rode together, the se
xes parted the minute they all got their feet wet. Why? I'm still curious myself. I really wanted to go up and ask the guys why they weren't communicating with the girls, but I was advised against it. We're pretty sure the breakdown is the following:

1 boy & 1 girl like each other. They each say "lets go to the beach, oh and I'll bring my friends".

1 boy & 1 girl each bring 2 friends for social back-up. The friends of the opposite sex are awkward, don't really like each other and are equally let down by the phy
sical appearance of the other.

Solution:




Official drink of the poor college student and fast awkward air breaker for those of the opposite sex.

What I Learned Today: that I am an old lady at heart. My beach buddy and I ended up moving down the sand do to loud, hang-banging music played by the awkward group next to us. I think they were trying to kill the awkward turtle in the room by blaring loud music to stop any possible chance of awkward conversation...I am officially old.

9.24.2010

Social Cues

Social Cues...in a public setting
This evening, "Running Off the Reese's" and I decided to not binge eat, or drink, and attend 2 movies and make dinner. Wow...we are both straight women, and we have active social lives...ok the active social life part is a total lie! We are total hermits who love the random movie night.

So! The major movies features included:



And...



....both cute, your typical chick flick.

So after starting with Easy A promptly at 4:45 p.m., we headed back to "Running Off the Reese's" apartment to cook some dinner and hang with our pet children, Maddie and Scout (arch nemeses).

By 7:40 we were back to the movie theater for You Again. Funny, yadda yadda, 1.5 hours later and the credits were rolling. But guess what the audience did?



NOTHING! They all just sat there, a solid minute and a half people did nothing. Just sat, watching the credits run by...slowly. I looked around to see if I was missing something...nope. Awkward as all get out!



Does anyone else see that it's that time? Time to leave!

Where did these people learn their movie-going social cues?

WHERE?!

9.22.2010

Das Boot: Part 2!

Monday
I love the movie Beerfest. So I love to quote it. I also love the fact that I wore DAS BOOT today! Not my own das boot, Running Off the Reese's was nice enough to lend me her extra pair of das rain boot for the rainy-day season. Bless her!



Just an aside...I wore das boot on Monday. It happen to be the only day this week when the sun was out and there was no rain.

(Cue "Blue Skies")



So I'm walking through campus with red rain boots on (that have bulldogs on them) and I'm pretty sure someone yelled, "Hey retard it's not raining!" when I walked by.

Thank you Texas A&M for letting me know that I was wearing rain boots...when it was NOT in fact raining, and there were no visible puddles to step in. Ya REALLY think I didn't already know that?!

Wednesday
Today is a new day however and I happen to get a chance to wear das boot out on campus again. I was worried at first. I woke up and by 10 a.m. it was pouring down rain, but would it still be raining by 12:30 when I had to leave for class?

...only time would tell.

At 12-o-clock I was loading up my book bag for a big day on campus and decided to risk the rain-boot-situation once more.

To my surprise it was POURING CATS AND MOTHER EFFIN DOGS when I walked out of pharmacology by 3:50 p.m., and that put a huge smile on my face. (Ha-ha! To all you flip-flop wearin' fools!)

I tipped my hat to the rain-maker



...tucked my jeans into my red rain boots, zipped up my jacket and happily passed by the onlookers as they stood (inside and) sad at the fact that they would have to walk through a solid inch of standing water (without rain boots) on their way to class.

Mua-hahahahahah....I wanted to throw my head back with laughter, but I held it together.



Even though I didn't laugh, I was definitely thinking silent thoughts...

"Who's retarded now?!"



I love das boot!

9.20.2010

I have my own Transformer! Wait...does this mean aliens are invading?!

Channel 6 News at 5
According to Dale, who has a tomato formula online, at Channel 6 news, Corpus Christi has officially received more than 10 inches of rain, 15 inches in some area! HOLY MOLY! That is insanity. Based off these measurements across town, I have decided it's time to give-in to to the fad and purchase... DAS RAINBOOTS! What, only 3 years late on following the fad?



I'm so tired of walking through water, getting the bottom of my pants wet and tempting the evil pneumonia to wreck-shop on my body that I am willing to wear das boot. Now I'm not yet to the point where I'm willing to pay for them...considering I'm brokeeeee. So you are more than welcome to purchase and ship them directly to my apartment in Corpus.

My Own Transformer!
With all this rain, I found out that my Toyota RAV4



...is actually a Transformer!



I ran and saw my good friend in the beautiful Kingsville, Texas and hit some standing water on the way back home last night. I was going about 60 mph, water flew, but my tires stayed glued to the pavement...no hydroplaning for this girl!

So I have decided my sweet RAV4 is actually a Transformer, I shall nickname her... Black Beauty, a wild mare who ropes the wind and dances through rain like it's her 21st birthday!



Just one more sign that aliens have possibly inhabited the earth and are waiting to take over!! Just kidding. I love War of the Worlds though... good ole Tom "Crazy" Cruise.

There is a Cat Dumper
...Somebody take her down!
According to the Daily Telegram, a UK woman put a cat in a dumpster. I know pets can be annoying, but ya don't put it in a trash can. I say somebody needs to put HER in a dumpster the next time she's being annoying.



And then, she says it's a joke?

9.19.2010

Like Mother Like Daughter

Cowboys v. Daaa Bears
Cowboys are kicking off their season now 0-2 for the first time since 2001, that's 9 years. They had their booties handed to them by the Bears.



But it's okay...maybe the Cowboys will get their ducks in a row and do some Superbowl work this season. Fingers crossed!!

I was born and bread a Dallas Cowboy fan, and will be for life! So I don't really have a choice in liking football, but yesterday's game was just so enthralling I decided when it got to half time, I would rest my eyes for a little bit. Ya know, I want to keep my green eyes fresh for every sack Roy Williams made. I wouldn't fight this guy...he seems so coordinated...and I am so....NOT! I choose to fight with my words, not my fists. You can call me a diplomat. For example, if I believe someone is wrong on an issue, I would say...

"YOU sir are incorrect!"


Roy Williams response.


"Did ya not hear me?! I said...."


Next thing I know it's 4:30 and someone's snoring jolted me out of deep sleep...considering I live alone and am an avid deadbolt locking fool, I'm sure the snoring was just the dog...yeah, had to be the dog.

Like Mother Like Daughter
So neither of us, Maddie or myself, are men so I can't use the phrase like father like son, which flows off the tongue so much better...but ya work with what ya got!

So come to find out, Maddie does in-fact snore, but I'm afraid the snore that awoke me from my coma-nap


yesterday did....sadly.....come from me. If you can't tell, I take napping very seriously. If you cover the face, no one can see all the awful expressions I make while I'm snoozing...and I feel as though bugs are less likely to crawl into my mouth.



And nobody likes a dirty mouth!
**ding**



To the point already!! Like mother like daughter comes from this picture that I will never forget. Maddie is passed out on a Sunday afternoon....with my shirt draped over her face to block out all the light...and to keep the bugs out of her mouth. I didn't put the shirt there just FYI, what a little white creeper.


Today's Goal: Get my spin on! Bring it on night-time spin class! Just call me Roy Williams! Ready and waiting to TAKE YOU DOWNNNN.

Today's Obsession: Getting through another bit of online work for school

9.17.2010

Oh what oh what is the Navy doing over there?

It was a Calm Day at the Pool when...
I was relaxing by the pool twice this week when an absurd and overwhelming noise filled the air! I'm no WWII survivor but wow did it feel like a bomb was going off somewhere! The sound hurt my ears and the ground was shaky!

There is a naval base here in town...



With several attractive men in uniform I'll note



...hhhhello!

So obviously...




And I'm use to planes flying low to the ground with pilots-in-training cruising the skies. The planes are red/orange and white strips. I have a good friend who's husband is in flight school here, so I always look up and wave when a plane goes by. I'm a nerd, I know. I'm sure I don't have to mention that I say, "hey Matt" every time a plane goes by...how embarrassing, I'm a 5 year old!

So I'm determined there was must be some sort of government conspiracy to wipe Corpus Christi off the face of the earth...it is the fattest city in America ya know. I wouldn't be surprised if someone set off a bomb here.

I Spoke Too Soon
Yeah...so I think I'm funny and I'm telling Running Off the Reese's this funny theory I have that the government would love to get rid of the fattest city of America when...BAM!

There was an EXPLOSION!



So I don't really believe there's a conspiracy and wow, what a coincidence.

Newsworthy?
Remember I got my degree in advertising, which is a sector of the School of Journalism at Texas State University so I'm all about generating news! So I was shocked that I didn't find this explosive fact out until I went to the gas station and purchased a newspaper, in order to see if there were any good garage sales Saturday morning. It kind of stinks that this sort of news didn't generate its way around town by now, it's already 8:15 p.m. ....the next day, after the explosion!

I wonder how many people in Corpus don't know about this?

Regardless, thank you Caller Times for publishing such critical news! Read the full article here.


Girls....I mean "Rats Gone Wild"

Not a Post about Rats Going Topless
I just wanted to point out the obvious that this post is not about rats taking their tops off, like some girls on the infamous "Girls Gone Wild." I mean, come on, rats don't wear clothes....what were you thinking!

So during a semi-fabulous $1 movie with Running Off the Reese's last night, I found out there are still movie theatres who don't have stadium seating. How strange! If those things still exist when I have kids I'm definitely taking them to one...their little pieces of history! Truth be told, it was the kind of theater you checked your seat for needles, but it was still a fun experience. I'll just be sure and get my kids vaccinated before I take them one day.

Anywho! So the movie was Twilight Eclipse...and I'm sad to say it was mediocre.

....nothing else to say on that subject.

Post-Mediocre Film-Making
So after I arrive home from this sub-par movie, I took the infamous Maddie outside to tinkle....she was speaking her mind like crazy when I got home last night so I knew she would need to walk around the entire apartment complex before settling down for the night.

That's when we ran into this "little" guy.



Cue hysterical screaming



Who is running a rat growth project in Corpus Christi?! Whoever you are....STOP!! Stop it right now! These things are the size of small cats...but fatter. Hm, I guess they could be compared to Scout, Running Off the Reese's Cat.



The circle of lifeeeee.

Whew! I could say getting me onto a little tangent about something random, so I will stop here and control my mind from wondering!

Today's Goal: Kill a freakin rat, what else!

Today's Obsession:
Doing not one bit of school work....ok well I'm going to read a little, but that's it! Other than that, it's all about the pool today.

9.15.2010

Common Ailments of the 1st Year Nursing Student

So You Want to be a Nurse?
I want to be a nurse...so I take the proper courses over 2 and 1/2 years so I can get my Bachelor's of Science in Nursing and ace the exam to become a registered nurse.



Who said ANYTHING about learning about all the diseases of the human body, the signs and symptoms, and current treatment and medications necessary to cure these ailments?!?!?!

Hypochondriac-say what
From pulling a muscle to chronic heart failure...there are so many things you can get, catch and die from...Ah! I'm determined that I have them all!



So now I'm determined I have an arrhythmia. Lol. Lord help me if I EVER purchase the book seen above.

Anyhow, the point of this blog post is the fact that I shall call the student health center tomorrow and schedule a well adult checkup...ya know... just in case.

9.12.2010

Disney Character Promiscuity

ABC Family Reruns
They are the...BEST! I got all caught up on my Disney movie collection this morning just laying in bed! Aladdin 1,



2



AND 3



were all on today...and all before 2:30! That's a prime example of good TV programming skills...trust me, I took a class on it.

Post-Aladdin going from rags to riches, good old Snow White came on...singing her heart out to every mammal in the forest she could find!



What a sweet gal. I wonder how sweet she'd be if she found out her beloved was also hanging out with....SLEEPING BEAUTY?! Compare the photos...Come on Disney, not all prince charmings look like this.



Picture 1 is Prince "no name" from Snow White...who I believe later ditched Snow White for the long blond locks of Sleeping Beauty...her pseudoname: Aurora. Picture 2 is Prince Phillip, who got tired of the pale-faced Snow White and headed for the land of 3 fairies.

This is all I have to say about "sweet" Snow White if she ever found out about this little Prince-sharing ordeal.



I'm sure she'd also be a hit story on the hit Oxygen TV show Snapped.

Today's Goal: It's late in the evening so I just hope I don't dream about Disney. It's all I think about these days between ABC reruns and work!

Today's Obsession: CHF: Congestive Heart Failure